I'm so FUCKING tired of the bias towards people w/ children!

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MissDivaDoll	I'm so FUCKING tired of the bias towards people w/ children!	Lead	[-]
Posts: 15882 (10/03/2008 4:31 PM) Reply Quote More Recent Posts Message Friend Block Invite Ignore	Yes, I'm aware that I'm speaking out of anger and that I'm probably being irrational and I don't care because this is how I'm feeling right now and I need to ventit all out. Once I calm down I'll probably apologize...maybe...but right now I'm pissed. I'm so sick of this. A lot of you don't know because I haven't posted too many details here, but I'm pretty sick right now and I have no clue why. It's been over two weeks and I've been in and out of the doctors office and to the hospital to run tests and get ultrasounds etc. All of my tests so far haven't shown anything, so I'm just being put on meds to help until we find the problem and a solution. It's been so bad that I haven't been able to work regularly because of the attacks I've been having on and off. Because I couldn't really work that much (and the money I was making was going to Dr. appts and tests) I just got really behind and almost wasn't able to pay my rent this month, until someone stepped in and helped me, to which I'm extremely grateful. I'm still not working much, but it's a catch 22. I have to force myself to work sometimes when I'm really bad off, so that I can afford to go to the doctor. So I went downtown last week to Job and family services to apply for a medical card to help with the doctor bills and some food stamps just to get me through this rough patch. I was told that they would send me a letter within a week to set up an appt. with a caseworker so that I could file my application. I get a letter today stating that I was denied because I refused to do an interview with a caseworker. So of course, I'm like WTF, somebody screwed up and I called down there. Turns out, they basically didn't even bother to file my app. and just denied me immediately because I wasn't diasabled and I wasn't currently pregnant and did not have children. I am SO fucking sick of this shit! I pay into this goddamn system with my tax money and I can't get any help from it just because I made the conscious decision not to pop out any fucking kids that I knew I wasn't able to take care of, unlike the other idiots in this fucking place?! This is bullshit. There's nothing I can do about being disabled. You either are or you aren't through no fault of your own, I'm sure. That's why I'm not angry about that. But this motherfucker that I spoke to basically told me point blank, "Go out and get pregnant and then come back and apply." YES!! THAT'S the thing to do you fucking MORON! I'll go out and have a baby, and make it even MORE impossible to survive (not to mention now having something to support and care for for the rest of my life, which I'm not ready to do) just so that I can get the measley little bit of aid that you would give me for it. I know it isn't much, but it might have been enough to help me out a little because it's just ME here. How the fuck would that help me if I had a kid too?! I'm just so angry that he even had the nerve to say that shit to me. I just feel like this society looks upon you SO much more favorably if you have kids, as if that somehow makes you better or more worthy for something than people who don't have kids or who don't want kids. And I really don't care about the argument of "Well obviously people with kids need more money/help because they're raising kids." I DON'T GIVE A FUCK! That was a choice. Nobody forced you to have a kid and it doesn't make you better or more deserving of anything than me because my choice was not to have kids. I'm not trying to be a hypocrite and rail right back at people with kids because I know it's not some huge conspiracy where everyone with children are like "Yeah, Let's take everything we can get and then deny the same things to people who didn't breed!!" I understand that. I just think it is completely unfair to give more help to someone because they are a mother or father, when I am just as worthy, just as deserving, and just as in need as anyone else. I have an idea! Maybe I'll go get pregnant, then go down and apply for the aid, and then after they approve me, I'll get an abortion! I really needed the help right now because I have nowhere else to get it from so I'm just very angry and upset right now. And if anyone is gonna come in here and start any shit with me, you can fuck off because I don't care. I'll tell you to eat shit and put you right on ignore.
Lideem		#1	[-]
Posts: 2614 (10/03/2008 4:40 PM) Reply Quote More Recent Posts Message Friend Block Invite Ignore	I think you have every right to be angry about it. I do not think people are more deserving just because they chose to pop out children either. This is what I believe is wrong with this country. People that truly need help sometimes do not get it. It is sad.
MissDivaDoll		#2	[-]
Posts: 15883 (10/03/2008 4:45 PM) Reply Quote More Recent Posts Message Friend Block Invite Ignore	I agree. It's bullshit the way this shit works. And I'm sorry for the post being so long but I just had to get it all out. I didn't even expect anyone to come in here and even read it.
JulieAnne20		#3	[-]
Posts: 23620 (10/03/2008 4:46 PM) Reply Quote More Recent Posts Message Friend Block Invite Ignore	That's really awful. I'm so sorry. I wish I could do something to help.
Purplelilac82		#4	[-]
Posts: 8188 (10/03/2008 4:47 PM) Reply Quote More Recent Posts Message Friend Block Invite Ignore	I understand how you feel. This system blows.
insomniachollie		#5	[-]
Posts: 37004 (10/03/2008 4:47 PM) Best Fan Fic Writer '08 Reply Quote More Recent Posts Message Friend Block Invite Ignore	So on the one hand the Government's criticising the culture where people are popping out too many kids they can't afford and putting more strain on th benefits system, trying to move people away from that and always asking what they can do to stop people getting into such situations... and on the other they're telling people to get pregnant to qualify for money? Interesting plan. Can't see it working.
Lideem		#6	[-]
Posts: 2615 (10/03/2008 4:49 PM) Reply Quote More Recent Posts Message Friend Block Invite Ignore	I hope they figure out what is wrong with you soon so you can get better.
ThatGirlXOXO		#7	[-]
Posts: 2109 (10/03/2008 4:49 PM) Reply Quote More Recent Posts Message Friend Block Invite Ignore	ITA... people with children are no more deserving than people without children, who decided to NOT have kids they can't afford.
Jonesy		#8	[-]
Posts: 309 (10/03/2008 4:53 PM) Reply Quote More Recent Posts Message Friend Block Invite Ignore	I understand how you feel and I DO have children. The system is just screwed up. I hope that you are really mad about the system in general and not us people with children? Alot of times we are in the same boat as you. I hope you can find someone more willing to help you find the resources you need.
MissDivaDoll		#9	[-]
Posts: 15884 (10/03/2008 4:57 PM) Reply Quote More Recent Posts Message Friend Block Invite Ignore	No, I'm certainly not mad at you or anyone with children. All I'm saying is that you having children was a choice that you made. I'm annoyed at the standard that we have in this country that says that you are more worthy of being helped in a time of need, than I am, just because you decided to conceive a child, and I decided not to.
Yeah Christianne		#10	[-]
Posts: 3707 (10/03/2008 4:58 PM) Reply Quote More Recent Posts Message Friend Block Invite Ignore	I think their mentality is that the children shouldn't have to suffer because of the parent's stupid decision, but I think you're totally justified being angry. You've been responsible and now you need some help, but they're not lending you a helping hand. I hope you get better soon.
Lilpeach85		#11	[-]
Posts: 107644 (10/03/2008 4:58 PM) Justin Fanatic '05 Justin Fanatic '07 Reply Quote More Recent Posts Message Friend Block Invite Ignore	Wow. How messed up. I'm sorry. I agree that this system is VERY messed up and its why I tend to not support it, exactly because of this shit.
DriLo		#12	[-]
Posts: 6075 (10/03/2008 4:59 PM) Reply Quote More Recent Posts Message Friend Block Invite Ignore	Hey I have kids and I still can't get help. I work and I am married but we fell on some bad times and needed help. I was off work for the summer and pretty much laid up and couldn't work at that time if I had found a job for the summer because my back. They told me that my husband could support us with is income. Yeah right. We struggled and got behind and to top it off right before summer ended and I was able to go back to work, he went on strike. My income wasn't enough then. We still couldn't get any help. They said he was still employeed and that counted. I was like well tell that to our kids who are hungry and the bills that need to get paid. It pisses me off that people need the help rather they have kids or not can't get it. Even if it's just food stamps. I mean honest people like you or I who have chosen not to have kids or to stop having kids. We can't get shit but bitches like my sister in law who refuses to do a damn thing is fucking breeding like roaches and is getting damn near $500 a month in food stamps and refuses to make her ragged ass baby daddies pay child support so us hard working people have to pay for her sorry ass. I feel your pain girl. I hope they find out what is going on with you and you get better. The system is fucked up and there are fucked up people out there making it hard for the ones who really need the help and never ask for it and when they finally do, get turned down. As far as that caseworker goes. Call his supervisor and then tell them that you have contacted a lawyer. Because what he said was rude and out of line.
Jonesy		#13	[-]
Posts: 310 (10/03/2008 5:00 PM) Reply Quote More Recent Posts Message Friend Block Invite Ignore	In my case it is disability for my child. I did decide to have her and her disability just came with her. We have problems all of the time with the system. You are absolutely right, us people with kids are no more entitled to anything, expecially aid in a crisis, than someone who has choosen not to have children. I know you don't want to give alot of details, but is there maybe some other avenue of aid you could try? I am sorry that you have to deal with this BS on top of all of your other troubles.
FreeSpiritSinger84		#14	[-]
Posts: 2689 (10/03/2008 5:02 PM) Reply Quote More Recent Posts Message Friend Block Invite Ignore	I totally understand. It's like people with kids generally have better paying jobs too. From what I've seen anyway. It's rather maddening.
Sleepn		#15	[-]
Posts: 12369 (10/03/2008 5:04 PM) Most Mysterious '08 Reply Quote More Recent Posts Message Friend Block Invite Ignore	what a trashy bastardized idea to have to "go out and get knocked up to qualify."
EmilyD1970		#16	[-]
Posts: 2507 (10/03/2008 5:06 PM) Reply Quote More Recent Posts Message Friend Block Invite Ignore	Even if you of got approved, you wouldn't of got shit. My friend has a disability. She has always worked but her disease was really acting up, and it was messing up her work, so she decided to go for food stamps. She was approved, but at $25 a week. The more people yo have in your family, the more you get. A single person won't get hardly anything. I don't really see it as a bias, I see it as nobody wants to see a child suffer, so obviously people with kids are going to be first. Edited By: EmilyD1970 10/03/2008 5:08 PM. Edited 1 times.
Mistress Darcy		#17	[-]
Posts: 5196 (10/03/2008 5:07 PM) Reply Quote More Recent Posts Message Friend Block Invite Ignore	It always drove me crazy when they would hire people all at the same level and then the people with kids would get these amazing brilliant hours NO ONE EVER GETS (M-F 8-4 instead of most associates getting either really super early hours or shitty ass 4-11 Thurs-Sunday hours) just because they had kids. Like, ok fine they have kids. We were all hired into the same position and the hours should be given out fairly-NOT hand all the shitty nasty ones ALL the time to the childless one while the two people with kids get vacations and perfect hours galore.
Yeah Christianne		#18	[-]
Posts: 3709 (10/03/2008 5:08 PM) Reply Quote More Recent Posts Message Friend Block Invite Ignore	$25 a week for food is a good start, and you can get plenty of meals out of that. If you need help, take what you can get. One person can live on $25 a week in food easily.
cls2		#19	[-]
Posts: 3573 (10/03/2008 5:11 PM) Reply Quote More Recent Posts Message Friend Block Invite Ignore	I have my own health prob/insurance run around story that I won't bore you with, but trust me when I say I know how you feel, and I'm sorry. (Although I've never been told to 'get pregnant and you'll be approved'. Wow.)
Mistress Darcy		#20	[-]
Posts: 5197 (10/03/2008 5:13 PM) Reply Quote More Recent Posts Message Friend Block Invite Ignore	I spend 25 a week on food right now and I don't consider myself "unable" to live on it.

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I'm so FUCKING tired of the bias towards people w/ children!

I'm so FUCKING tired of the bias towards people w/ children!

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